In an attempt to be positive I tried to remember the last time I was happy but I couldn’t. I don’t really feel connected to that word. I remember the last time I was proud of myself and I remember the last time I felt actively grateful but I don’t know what happiness looks like for me. With healthy actions I can get to gratitude and self-appreciation quickly. But happy? I’m not sure. It makes me sad not being able to remember. Maybe happiness is gratitude, for me. But I see others be able to identify a difference between the two, for them. I am also really good at feeling geniune joy for others. Like really deeply. It doesn’t matter how long it has been how far away or near you are. I am good at being happy for others. But not for me.